(The following is a slight modification of the boilerplate language for this section. Why replace something that only needs light tinkering? And in this case the tinkering is a Mad Libs-style fill in the blank aided by one of my favorite sources of insanely beautiful and odd words (Oxford Dictionary))
I am extremely <callithumpian> and <extramundane> to share my latest <cacoethes> with you. My close friends, family, and of course my pet cats know how much <anfractuous> work was put into getting this first chapter ready for release and publication. I’m so excited to finally share <Stan the Barbarian> with a wider audience and hope you enjoy it.
Don't <absquatulate> without buying a copy. Later chapters, soon to be released, promise <bawdy jokes, bardolatry, and a magical talking cucumber>.